Survived my first two shifts!

so i had my first two official day shifts on friday and saturday and i can say that they went well. i was pretty tired during the shift... it's re-adjusting to waking up at 6am and being awake and active for 12 hours.... -______- i am so exhausted after my shifts that i just want to shower and go to SLEEP. clearly during the days when i have straight shifts in a row, i will not have a life.

it's a bit sad working at a children's hospital because you see all these poor kids with health conditions, problems and diseases and you just feel bad that they're going through so much pain at such a young age. after working with the adult and geriatric population for awhile, you kind of become insensitized and assume the fact that a lot of their health problems were brought upon themselves from lifestyle choices or what not. but when you work in pediatrics, you realize how many health issues are actually just congenital or even related to social determinants of health that aren't of choice by the children and families... i love seeing the little month-old babies and holding them! SOOOO CUTE. and then you have the 15 year olds with attitudes and just want you to leave them alone. just from the two days of working, it's very clear that there is a lot for me to learn.... not only clinical skills but also therapeutic communication and lots of basic principles of child and family centered care. >______< i should probably buy a pediatric textbook.

after work on saturday, kylie & i went out for dinner and some WINDOW shopping on Robson. the weather was SOOOOOOO FREAKING NICE, it was too bad that we were stuck at work all day :( but we made a deal to go out after work even if we were really tired. so we ate at Guu (japanese tapas restaurant) which was pretty yummylicious. i really liked the kimchi fried rice, jellyfish & shark fin salad and grilled pork belly. i can't wait to go back to try more stuff hehe.

well this week should be pretty sweet. i have workshops monday and tuesday and my first night shift on wednesday! then i have 5 days off - lots of time to catch up on reading, run errands, learn to actually cook SOMETHING other than instant noodles and explore! hopefully the weather will be on my side and i'll be able to do some outdoorsy things.

i picked up my lululemon pants today and i LOOOOOOOOVE them. i swear, it is an unwritten law to be required to own and wear lululemon if you are a resident of Van. after i picked them up, i went to Blenz Coffee (i like their strawberry tea latte!) to do some research, use wifi and people watch. i live pretty close to South Granville and i explored some of the shops around there. lots of cute shops and yummy looking restaurants. excited to try some of them in the future.


downloaded 范范 and 阿妹's new albums today~ hopefully i will enjoy them... but my song of the moment is still 紅豆－ 方大同

xo

new rainboots!

can't wait til they come! i hope they look cute. haha :) ok, a real update later.

xo

it's official!... or is it?

hello! :]

One significant thing that happened during orientation today: we received our photo id! i feel all professional now. hahaha, it's like getting handed your diploma... it's official! it even says REGISTERED NURSE! ...yeah... let's not celebrate that until we find out for sure. -_- but heres a pic of it! it was printed kind of...un-centered but i'll get over it i think. i'm a perfectionist about these type of things... if it were up to me, i would reprint one until it was perfectly centered >__<

i was so sleepy during orientation all day. i was just looking forward to crawling back into my bed. but as i was walking home from the hospital, i was thinking about the weather and i realized something. it's July and i'm used to it being SUPER HOT and i realized that if i was walking the same distance at home in California right now... i would probably be sweating and so uncomfortable. but today, it was mild, some barely light rain and in the 70's and i wasn't cold and wasn't hot... and it was actually really comfortable walking home in this weather. so i'm starting to appreciate the weather here and like it for what it is. i swear, everywhere i go, i slowly realize how blessed California is with its amazing weather but in some small ways i start to appreciate the different weather i experience in other places.

tomorrow's my day off and i'm working friday and saturday. i'm going to dim sum (YESSSSSSSSSSS!) tomorrow morning with Uncle Dennis and Uncle William (two of my dad's bffs) and hopefully it won't be too awkward. i'll probably go to Ikea with Jen to pick up some things... and i'll have to do some reading and prepare for my first shift. dear god, i hope i can fall asleep the night before...

so i've been hanging out with Chelsea and Jen (both girls I graduated with from college) and we've been having some fun when we have time to get together. hehe i can tell we're going to have many more adventures to come.  i'm glad i have these girls here ... we have a special Mac bond because we know exactly what each other went through the past 4 years to get to where we are now... so we can be each other supports here :) here we are at kitsilano beach trying to spell MAC haha. also please note my latest summer dress that i LOOOOOOOOVE. yes, love. it was the last one, EVER from the warehouse. <3 

well that's it for today! 1 more day......

Orientation so far

well, today was my 2nd day of orientation! today was a lot more interesting than yesterday as it was more nursing related and specific to the staff working only at the Children's and Women's hospital. yesterday was literally an orientation to PHSA (the motherboard agency) and it was pretty boring... nothing interactive at all haha. but today i met a lot more people and generally everyone is super nice. only a few are from Vancouver and the rest of us are all from different places! lots from Ontario, one from Australia, New Zealand, London (UK) and other places but generally it's pretty diverse. age and experience range as well... i would say that 35% are new grads like me! i met this girl who was a competitive swimmer and we were talking about the possibility of doing masters swimming? hahaha ugh i'm so completely out of shape that my body probably doesn't even remember what muscle is. but it's nice to know i have someone to go swimming with. anyways it's been pretty cool meeting everyone and it's amazing to see how people from all across the world with different backgrounds and experience all come together for one thing: to be a specialized pediatric nurse at BC Children's. 

the nursing resource team (NRT) that i'm working on, consists of 17 of us. hopefully we get to work with each other often and become good friends... i'm getting trained on three units including: renal/metabolic and endocrine, cardiac and neuro surg. i'm excited to get a variety of experience and then hopefully pick a specialized path and work regularly on a unit.... but yeah we'll see how this goes. everything's new so ahhhhhhhh! i think i'm more freaking out about my first shift which is this FRIDAY. i forget what 12 hour shifts are like........ >.<

it rained like all day today. i really need those rainboots and a cute rain jacket. i don't have anything waterproof in my wardrobe... other than this one tna vest. how is that even possible? i think it's time to hit the lululemon OUTLET (thats right beeeeeeeezies, OUTLET!!!). ok not until i make some monies. haha. dude i was walking home and i watched these two guys get SOAKED by this huge SUV that drove by SUPER fast SUPER close to the curb.....omg they were soaked from head to toe. i kind of laughed inside but felt so bad for them. but i know for sure one day that's definitely going to happen to me........-___-

well, what can i say... there is the good and the bad. hopefully i can focus on all the positive things and forget about the things that hurt me and make me sad. thank you to my friends who read my blog and comment/ email me... i love you and miss you guys sooo much.

pic!

ahh i was going to write about my first orientation day but i'm too tired now and honestly, it wasn't anything too exciting. picture isntead :)

this is Kitsilano Beach. see the city and mountains in the distance? love it :)

So I'm here!

well i've been in Vancouver for a couple days so far and so far i'm liking it. the weather's been super nice but it's going to start getting kinda cloudy/rainy into the 70's starting today. hopefully it doesn't rain too much because i don't have any cute rainboots yet haha :P

Vancouver is a beautiful city... i love how you can see the downtown city buildings with the mountains in the background. i went to Kitsilano beach yesterday and it was so cute! the beaches here are so different... well i think there are several different types of beaches. ones right along the ocean coast, some along the bay and some other bodies of water that feed from the ocean. Kitsilano beach has a swimming area sectioned out as well as a HUGE outdoor swimming pool that is filled with salt water and it's right by the ocean so you can go lap swimming and like...still be at the beach! i like that Vancouver has the city life for those looking for the busy things and exciting-ness but offers such beautiful nature to enjoy outdoor activities and sporty things. 

we went to Robson St yesterday too- SHOPPPPPPING! went to the first Aritzia store hehe. let's just call yesterday a success as i located the Aritzia base, Tiffany & Co, Louis Vuitton and found Japadog! i'm also happy to report that the mall super close to me (Oakridge Mall... kind of ironic because there's the Westfield Oakridge Mall close to my house at home in Norcal hehe) has Lululemon and Aritzia!! Super EASY ACCESS. :]

hmm... what else. oh where i'm living. so i'm renting a room in a house in Shaughnessy (gorrrrrgeous) temporarily until i pretty much find out my exam results, how much i like my job, how stable my job is and how long i think i'll be staying in Vancouver. my room is a good size, it came furnished with a full size bed, desk, closet, drawers etc. and a tv (with cable!). haha ok the tv with cable is probably the only thing i would call an *upgrade* from my life at home. i also have a small patio and one wall is all glass windows so it lets in all the sun during the day/afternoon and fresh air. i plan to sit there during the day to read/study/eat and stuff. it's good extra storage space and a good little area. oh, i'm sitting here now as i type this haha. the only thing i don't really like is the bathroom. i have to share with the other tenants (2 guys, 1 girl) and from what i see, the guys are dirty and the girl is clean. but there's this nasty smell...ugh. i'm going to buy air fresheners. i think it's because the house is kinda old... well, other than that i don't really have a problem. i think this will just take a lot of getting used to. hopefully i can move out soon. but then again, i am saving a lot of money living here so... i guess i'll just have to see.

adjusting has been rough. orientation starts tomorrow and hopefully i'll meet some more new grads like me and not feel so lonely. i lost support that i used to have and i think that makes a huge difference for me. i'm adjusting to my new beginning, new job, new city, new people and ... other changes. one thing continues to hit me the hardest and it's always in the back of my mind no matter how hard i try not to think about it. i thought i would be able to handle it okay... i thought i prepared myself and i was ready... obviously i am not. i know it'll take some time  but it's so painful crying everyday. i don't want to but sometimes it's like i can't help it. i want to not think about it and not let it bother me but it does. and i don't know what to do. i think i should listen to Better in Time on repeat.

it'll all get better in time.

what's left?

dear blog, sorry i've neglected you. so may things have been happening...

the exam has been over and done with for awhile. sigh. let's not speak of it and just cross our fingers.

i'm graduated. yay...!

and we're just friends.

just friends.

the two words constantly repeating in my head everytime i think about you, talk to you or mention you.

"Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened." 

i can't decide whether to smile or to cry. i want to do both.

here comes goodbye

here comes the last time

here comes the start of every sleepless night

the first of every tear i'm gonna cry

here comes the pain

here comes me wishing things had never changed

that she was right here in my arms tonight

why does it have to go from good to gone?

before the lights turn on, and you're left alone

here comes goodbye.